Message preached at World AIDS Day Service, Dec 3, 2003 at Tradewinds Bar in Columbus, Ohio
by Rev. Marj Creech, God’s Promise MCC of Granville, Ohio
http://my.core.com/~risenregan/
TITLE: “God is pro-gay, pro-sex, and pro-leather!
Where else can you get a church service with communion on a bar railing, you can sit on a bar stool like some of you are doing, see all this beautiful leather on people, AND you get flashing disco lights on the steps to the altar?
Maybe we should have Leather Church here every Wednesday!
Actually I want to thank all the folks who made this possible--especially by their behind-the-scenes work. Most of all I want to thank Tradewinds for letting us have this World AIDS Day of Remembrance Service here. We did this here last year, and we did ok, considering there was a bad snowstorm and it was Thanksgiving week--end. Please tell your friends and we’ll do this every year. We are dedicating this service to Eddie, the manager of Tradewinds last year who first said, “Sure, you can have the service here.” He passed away in February of this year and we remember him tonight.
A word about communion. I know that Christians are not the only ones here tonight and obviously Christians are not the only ones affected by AIDS. But many of us ARE Christian and many of us have been rejected by the churches we grew up in or by another church that said, “We are open to ALL people...just like Jesus was for ALL the nations, not just the Children of Israel,” but our ALL really means all people EXCEPT for gay people. Or they say, “OK, you gay people can come into our church but not you bisexual people....this is as embarrassing for us as it is for you.”
Or “well, I guess you gay and bisexual people can come in,” but if a man shows up in a dress, well…the children, you know...” (They are really afraid some of the children might discover they want to cross dress, too!) Or they say, “OK, all you GLBT folks can come in...I understand that you can’t help it...you were born that way. But you people dressed up in leather...?!? Ok, leather is ok as clothing, but whips?!? (That’s a flogger to you, Pastor) Harnesses? Nipple clamps?? (Can your pastor even say, “Nipple clamps”?) “You people are sick and perverted!!!” “You want me to believe that your behavior is a genetic disposition?” (well, actually....)
We need Leather Church, I suppose.
And sure it’s not just the Christian Church that rejects people. Orthodox Jews, or certainly the Ultra-Orthodox, would just as soon stone us and strict Islam wants to shoot us or put us in jail to rot....no wonder so many GLBT’s are pagan!
So we are having communion because we can. Some will be blown away by the contrasts--church in a bar, communion on a bar railing where people usually put their drinks. “How many times,” you may be thinking, “have I leaned up against this very railing in my chaps or jeans, and thought...well... Unchurchly thoughts.”
But see, that’s the problem!!! We’ve been brainwashed into thinking that body and soul are separate...and body comes out as the bad guy!
Sex particularly has been portrayed as sin...ANY sex!...vanilla, heterosexual, missionary position sex, even...it’s ok as long as you don’t ENJOY it too much!! And for heaven’s sake don’t talk about it in church.
Did you know that the Bible is FULL of a healthy regard for sex? Sexual innuendo, earthiness, all get translated out! “Be fruitful and multiply!” doesn’t say don’t enjoy it. What a pro-sex command, “Be fruitful and multiply,” and now the conservative right won’t let US, of all people, “be fruitful and multiply.” For us it would be, “Be full of fruit and recruit!”
Even Paul in the New Testament, who gets a well-deserved rap from gay people today, said, (and I paraphrase) “If you burn with lust, for heaven’s sake get married!” (We’re trying Paul, we’re trying...) He also said, “if you fast for a while--which included abstinence from sex--be sure it’s not for too long; get back together again and DO IT!!”
Notice that the Bible doesn’t say-- anywhere --that if you are unable to produce children, or if you don’t choose to, you should stop having sex! The only admonitions against having sex are very simply, “don’t do it in the context of idolatry”--such as the infamous Male Temple Prostitutes did-- (that commandment: ‘Thou shalt have no other gods before Me!’), and the attempted rape of out-of-town guests at Lot’s house in the village of Sodom…Don’t do this either! Attempt to rape out-of-town guests...unless it is consensual!
Never does the Bible say that EUNUCHS--that is, those who are either incapable of reproduction or who chose NOT to reproduce because of natural disposition--no where does the Bible say eunuchs should not have sex! Philip didn’t baptize the Ethiopian Eunuch and then say, “but you can’t have sex any more!” And guess how eunuchs had sex? Often ALL male genitalia was removed! An automatic bottom!
Isaiah 56--look it up--Five six--God, not just the prophet, but God, says, “Eunuchs are now accepted into My assembly”--we have a NAME--that is a remembrance--that is better than having a son or daughter... eunuchs meaning those who do not reproduce, or who chose not to by natural disposition.
I’m tired of people who have no idea of what they are talking about using this Holy Book against us.
I’m tired of people who don’t even know what good sex is, telling us we are having too much!
I’m tired of the Church inviting us to the table but when we get there telling us “Go away1” because we are dressed in leather... or lace... or because we are not in committed monogamous couplings that look like their tepid, sterile, guilt-ridden, often abusive marriages.
OK, before we get carried away and start ogling the acolytes and these handsome men and women in collars, clergy or otherwise…let me tell you that there ARE some guidelines about sexual behavior. We could get these from the Bible, but I won’t bore you with any more Bible verses BECAUSE you can get the same thing from LEATHER ETHICS!! Yes, there are Leather Ethics.
New Leather says, “SAFE, SANE, and CONSENSUAL.” This is great as far as it goes. Safe, for God’s sake! We’re tired of people dying! Sane means you don’t do anything irrational, and who would argue with “consensual”?
BUT Old Guard Leather has three Other Words:
“HONOR, RESPECT, and OBEY”
Sometimes this is said, “Honor, TRUST, and obey”
Honor says it all. If a person has honor, that pretty much sums up their character. It means they keep their word, they do what’s right in any given situation, even if that means saying, “I’m sorry,” or saying, “No, I won’t have sex with you, you are too drunk to know when to stop.” Honor is respecting someone’s covenant with another. Honor means no coercion. Honor EARNS respect and trust.
Trust means you trust yourself or you don’t go into a situation. You trust yourself because you’ve got a track record, you have self-control and discretion. You trust yourself to take good care of your partner. You’ve EARNED respect and trust. You respect the other’s boundaries. When they say, “These are my boundaries”—ok, you may play around right at the edges of the boundaries, but you know just how far you can go and still respect their boundaries. You are a caring top.
Obey is not just for bottoms, “NO SIR!!”
It’s for tops obeying the wishes of the bottom. It is obeying the internal rules you’ve already set up for yourself, such as “I WILL use a condom every time. I will sanitize all equipment and not use it unless I am SURE it is clean.” Obey means listening to that still small voice inside that is your conscience, your moral compass, your God.
Now just one more thing--about guilt--sometimes the voice inside isn’t God at all, but a self-destructive voice of an enemy--old tapes from church, from parents, that really aren’t good messages at all. I know some here tonight feel guilty that you are still alive while your friends and partners are dead. You did the same things they did, yet you are alive. Guess what? It’s NOT YOUR FAULT you are alive!! And if you are suffering because you think you gave someone HIV, let me ask you,
Did you set up a lab and grow the AIDS virus?
Did you cut government funding for AIDS research?
Did you make it too expensive to buy cheap drugs because greedy drug companies won’t allow generic versions to be made?
Did you rape a sex partner?
If not, then you may have played some small part in transmitting HIV, but you are NOT the major cause!
AIDS is a disease and anybody can get it. It has a random quality, hitting nurses who prick their fingers with a contaminated needle, and missing the most sexually active bottoms! It is not God’s judgment. You may have been bad, but you are not bad enough to deserve the guilt you may have heaped upon yourself! I think, sometimes, our shame about who we are contributes to AIDS transmission—we sneak around and do what we wouldn’t do if we were just proud of who we are!
If you are still feeling guilty, then for God’s sake, for your own sake, confess and ask forgiveness! Everybody makes mistakes, everybody has done something unsafe sometime. Two people, Rev. Margaret Hawk from New Creation MCC and Gail Simonds, a seminary student, will be standing just outside the communion servers, Gail over there, near where you order drinks. They will pray for ANYTHING you ask them to--healing, forgiveness, broken relationships, whatever...you don’t have to take communion to be prayed for, and you don’t have to be Christian...they’ll pray for everybody, just ask.
Finally, we have come to honor and respect those who have passed on. While we grieve--and this is cathartic--and we miss them and the pain is almost too much to bear--I believe we will see them again. I don’t know where or when, but it is God’s promise that in God’s house there are many mansions--a place is prepared for each of us. One mansion is the leather mansion, and another is for non-leather folks. But in God’s house and God’s dominion, ALL will be welcome, ALL are welcome.
[We’re going to sing “Friends,” by Michael W. Smith, while someone passes the plates (Ok, they are ashtrays!)—all the money goes to the Columbus AIDS Task Force and the Licking County Task Force.]